Your STUPID-19 test results
It’s your doctor. I’ve got bad news. You’ve tested STUPID-19 positive. Which one you ask? The big one of course. Please find below your diagnostic test report -
|Mental input||Presence of imaginary conversations in unlikely scenarios observed||Remedy at the earliest by reading a book, learning a new language or starting an online course|
|Mental output||Patient exhibits problematic activities like partaking in political debates on meme page comment sections||Strong intervention of da homies with philosophical discussions and intellectual masturbation sessions required|
|Physical input||Stuffs face hole with maggi, sugary drinks masquerading as “fruit juice”, and foods that have gone through 17 stages of processing||Skip the delivery foods like you do the workouts and go for home cooked whole foods|
|Physical output||Maximum daily movement seen was walking to the door to collect food delivery||Get that ass moving with dance, running or some home YouTube workouts #FlattenYourCurves|
|Creative input||Severe deficiency of the following was observed||Watch those old classics in your list, read an autobiography, listen to music other than Nicki Minaj|
|Creative output||Alarmingly high concentration of TikTok videos and Instagram stories||Advised to paint, play a musical instrument, cook (also helps in survival), dance, write a blog or take a pottery class|
Final diagnosis - Tested positive for STUPID-19
Please undertake corrective action immediately to prevent permanent damage.
The above is a work of fiction. All ideas are pure conjecture and all propositions can be assumed to be thought experiments.